Here's a peek at our house at 1:30 am...
just in case you were wondering.
A grunting noise wakes me from the hopeful sleep I have just drifted off into. Immediately, my body tenses knowing what is most likely coming next. Sure enough, the piercing cry of a newborn fills our room. He just finished eating twenty minutes ago, his diaper is changed, he's swaddled up and warm, a white noise machine fills the air with what should be calming, sleep inducing noise. Yet...he's not sleeping. In fact, he sounds downright uncomfortable. A burp? Gas? Exhausted, I make the trek (yes, trek) across the the bedroom to pick up our beautiful baby from his bassinet.
Almost immediately, his tiny body relaxes, the grunting replaced with even, deep breathing. His body burrows deep into my arms, absolutely content and exactly where he wants to be. I climb back into bed holding our precious boy. And even as my mind and body scream for sleep, my heart is filled with love and amazement. I can not help but stare at his perfect face and breath in his newborn scent. And there in the quiet of the night away from all distractions, I feel an overwhelming love for this baby seeping deep into my soul. In a few short weeks, he has become as much a part of me as his three siblings and I feel acutely aware that a part of my heart will always reside in this sweet little boy. My heart whispers a silent prayer of thank you for this precious gift and responsibility.
A couple hours later when it's time to eat again, Baby E wakes from his restful sleep and I wake from my half sleep my arm dead from the weight of his little head and a kink in my neck. I am tired and a little grumpy about another night of sub par rest...but still so very, very grateful and so in love with this little guy.